Realization

thememorythatputsasmileonmyface
isthesamememorythat
hauntsme.

This is the first time that I'm gonna broadcast to everybody what I feel for the past months. Kaya pasensya na.hehehe. If you do not know, I have been stuck at home for almost 6 months already eversince that day and not a day passes by without the "What If" questions. I know that I should put the past behind and start to see the future, but the past haunts me every time I think of them. Every moment I spent with my friends. Every Laughter. Every Hardships. Every Sleepless nights. Every Joketime. Every Achievement. Every Dream. Every Gimmicks. All of them. I did all of these without knowing that one day all of these would haunt me. If I could just turn back time and fix everything I would, but I can't. So I just need to face it and step forward.

EmOmode

Facing It wasn't easy. Not easy at all. I can say that it is the hardest process and requires humility, patience and understanding. People will think negative about you especially if you have proven yourself in the past. You cannot face the people who admire you. The downfall of your confidence. Depression. The darkest moment of your life. But come to think of it, your problem is nothing compare to other people. We just dwell on it so much and instantly enters us to the depression stage. That's what I have been doing 2 to 3 months ago. Stuck and Motionless.

shutupandletmeGO

If you humbled yourself, waited and understood. The Light bulb will spark and give you your next move. You can think clearly without your emotions and decide things for the better. I am on this stage right now. I am proud to say that I have empowered depression and defeated its comrades. Although sometimes I cannot stop myself in reminiscing, I just accept it and move forward. I cannot dwell on the past too much. I just need to Step Forward.

I thank my one and only God for not leaving me in this journey alone. I know that everything that happened and that will happen is part of your plan for me and no matter what it takes I will accept it with all my heart. Lakas ng tama mo sa akin Lord.